Yesterday’s post took a lot out of me. Luckily today is National Goof-Off Day and I plan to do just that — only I have to do this little thing called “work.”
Good thing I teach in a school full of very creative students. They give me lots of excuses why they were late, missed class or why they didn’t do their homework. These are the best of the best (trust me, these guys should be in the Excuses Hall of Fame.)
- Sorry I’m late, but the bus caught on fire.
- I missed class on Tuesday because they had to remove my ankle bracelet (I’m finally free.)
- I couldn’t do my homework because I was in jail and forgot my books.
- I didn’t do my research paper because the library went out of business.
- My grandmother died again. (Last count, this student was up to 9 grandmothers.)
- I was driving to school and I looked up and had no idea where I was. I found it, though. Sorry I’m late.
- My boss was holding me hostage; so I couldn’t make it to class.
- My two-year old flushed my flash drive down the toilet and my homework was on it.
- I couldn’t come to class because I lost my cell phone. (NOTE: being without your cell when you’re 20 something is like leaving the house naked.)
- I didn’t come to class because I forgot to do my laundry.
I swear I did not make these up. They are actual excuses from my students. The worst part of this is that I have to keep a straight face while they give these excuses. Laughing is unprofessional, I’m told.
Which one should I use when I call off today?
- I Sing Quite Out Loud (http://eitheory.com/)
- Today’s Motivation (http://philammann.com/)
- Are You Too Busy or Too Tired (http://www.stretchbeyondstuck.com/)
- Finding Your Way (http://thepossibilitarianslight.wordpress.com/)
- Smile (http://lscotthoughts.com/)
- Why are You Stressed Out How to Fix It (http://amsdaily.net/)
- Under Pressure (http://clownponders.wordpress.com/)
- Relax You’re Exactly Where You are Supposed to Be (http://goss-coaching.com/)
- 7 Worst Excuses for Turning in An Assignment Late (collegecandy.com)
- Chill (http://optimistforever.wordpress.com/2012/03/20/chill-2/)